Archive for Best Thing I Heard

Aug
07

Perceptions

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So, here’s the progress on day 5:

Can’t wait!

I have to share a little funny with you from yesterday. I was going through the junk mail, and there was a bunch of stuff from Kohl’s. First, YAY!, I got a 30% off coupon for next week. That just means shopping. Can’t pass that up. Second, there was a separate book with ‘intimates.’ This was the picture that was on the front:

I’d guess that would be a giraffe print? Maybe a ‘crackle” bra?  Well, Chloe set me straight.  She hopped up to the kitchen island where this ad was sitting and stated, “Mom!  That lady is wearing a steak bra!”

Classic.

Have a great weekend!

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Apr
19

Who Turned Out The Lights?

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Let me tell you about the big, crazy storm we had on Friday.  Friday started out great…eighty degrees, sunny, and just a little breezy.  My neighbor called me to sit outside for a bit while the kids played.  We did just that, and then it was time to head to the bus stop.  As we’re getting ready to go, it started to drizzle.  So, we pile ourselves, Chloe, her four year old and the one year old that she watches into her mom-mobile (aka mini-van).  The bus stop is not even two blocks away.  By the time we park the van, it starts to rain.  A lot.  And holy wind, Batman!  I looked through the windshield and saw a trampoline tumbling through a yard and into the street.  It was crazy.  Another Mom jumped in the car with us and we waited for the bus in the storm.  When it came, we just piled every kid we could into the van.  I got home, picked up the pieces of one destroyed playhouse, let the dog in (yes, he was scared and very, very, wet), and got on the horn.

There was damage everywhere.  Trampolines were ruined, tons of shingles were missing (thankfully, not from my house).  And the icing on the cake?  No electricity.  If you’ve never experienced a loss of power with small children, you are missing small people asking you the same thing about eight bazillion times.  “When is the power coming back on?!?!”

We got through the first hour and a half pretty easily.  I actually took a little nap while they watched the battery operated television we have.  Then it died.  So, I told them to just play!  It wasn’t dark.  So they did play blocks for a while, and they were ok (aside from fitting that famous question in whenever they could).  We got a bath and got ready for bed.  Still no power.  I was figuring that it would come back overnight.  No such luck.  They woke me up at 6:50 am.  I very calmly (but sternly) looked at them with my one open eye.

“Can you do me a favor?  Brush your teeth, get an outfit and brush your hair.  Mommy needs some coffee, so we’re going out for pancakes.”

That took the edge off.  We had a great breakfast, went to Downey’s House, I did my work and we came home.  And, YAY! We had power.

Everybody made it through the “big ordeal” just fine.  Except maybe for the dog.  He starts to whimper every time it starts to sprinkle when he’s outside. :(

One little snippet from the weekend that I have to share.  As we (which includes Tony) were out and about yesterday, there was a “gentleman” who just wouldn’t let me in to merge while I was driving.  He wasn’t very nice.  Tony let him know that while he was looking in his rear view mirror.  I’m sure the man read Tony’s lips while he said “Thanks for letting her in, Dickhead!”

Becca promptly said “Yeah!  You’re a stickhead, man.”

I’m sure glad she said THAT.

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Apr
05

Happy Mom

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I love it when everything goes the way I want.  Not that everything is perfect, but we rolled pretty well this holiday weekend.  Day two of spring break involved a trip to the outlet mall.  New clothes, shoes and sunglasses for the chicks. (And 40 percent off at Old Navy!  Yay!).  Then, we stopped for some lunch.  Granted, it wasn’t exactly the lunch that I would have chosen.  It was Burger King.  With an indoor play area.  But hey, it worked.

Next?  Hair cuts for the girls.  Then we were off to neighborhood happy hour.  Beer and snacks for me, and lots of kids, swings and a trampoline for the kids.  We had a great time, and we didn’t leave until midnight.  I must say, I have a great bunch of neighbors.  The only thing missing on Friday were mani/pedis ;)

Saturday I got to see my brother and his family, and enjoy the AWESOME EASTER BREAD that my Dad makes.  He ships it up to us from Florida.  Yummy.  I thought for sure that the girls would be sooooo tired that they would have fallen asleep by 8:00.  notsomuch.  I think the bath (that I couldn’t skip, because they were absolutely filthy) woke them up.  Easter involved another egg hunt (in which both of my kids won prizes – THANK GOD!) and dinner with family.  Beautiful weather all weekend.

Today they spent the day at my sister-in-law’s while I went to work.  Another beautiful day.

I’ll end the update with a couple of things that Chloe said.  Last night she asked me if, when you go into the hospital to get your baby taken out, do they give you a tattoo?  I explained that no, that’s not how it works.  When she asked for more info, I told her that, WHEN I WAS A GROWN UP, I paid a tattoo artist to give me a tattoo.  She told me that she wants a star tattoo.  Then I told her how much it hurts.

She’s weighing all the facts.

At my sister-in-law’s today, while Chloe was inside and my SIL was outside, she opened the door and asked “Aunt Missy, is skin meat?”

Uh….OK.

And I’ll leave you with that.

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Mar
24

A Store For Giants

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Chloe and I went to Costco today.  I’m sure you can already see where this title is going.  We needed some groceries, but not a ton.  We ended up with 54 rice crispy treats, milk, half and half, a gigantic container of strawberries, cashews and some other stuff.  All food (except for the ‘Home Defense’ bug spray.  What a deal.  A gigantic container for only 8 bucks).  I don’t go to Costco all that often.  Why?  Because I end up walking out with food, a new book, a video game, and other stuff that I THINK I need.

As we were walking through the bakery (because I told Chloe she could get cookies), we browsed.  Have you seen the Costco cupcakes?  They are gigantic!  I mean, they have to be three times the size of a normal cupcake.  Chloe then asked me if the food in there is made for REALLY big people.  Yup, I guess so.  I do have to say, though, that I DIDN’T buy the coconut cream pie because it was just too damn big.  And I would have to eat the entire thing.

We paid for our groceries, and stopped to buy our customary churro.  As we were driving home, Chloe talked to me about what she did in school today.  They were talking about weather.  She said “Mom.  Weather is either a tiger or a sheep.”

:::huh?:::

OOOHHHHHHH, you mean either a lion or a lamb?  OK, I get it.

By the way, today got a lamb :)

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Mar
21

Spring, Ice Cream and Dirt

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I have this little ritual.  I think I’ve been doing this since I was able to drive.  As soon as I see that Dairy Queen has opened for the season, I have to get on the phone and yell that it is, in fact, open.  Back when I was sixteen, and cell phones were thousands of dollars and almost as big as my car, I drove home first.  Now, I have my handy dandy iPhone.

So, it was St. Patrick’s Day and I went to get our personal taxes done started.  It was a beautiful day.  Sunny and warm.  Tony caught me on my cell just as I was leaving the accountant.  He needed some supplies for the bar…could I stop somewhere?  No problem.  I headed to Wal-Fart, which meant I had to pass the DQ.  (Now that I live out in the ‘burbs, I don’t drive past a DQ very often).  It was open!  I got right back on that cell and screamed to Tony “DAIRY QUEEN IS OPEN!!!!”  I never seem to stop on that very first day I see that it’s open.  I save it.  I plan for it.

The days passed.  We had fantastic weather.  There was bike riding, chalk drawing, basketball, roller skating, swings, bubbles.  All that good stuff.  Well, yesterday I made the plan.  I told the girls that we could head to DQ after dinner.  Ice Cream?  Sprinkles?  They were in.  As we were getting ready to head out, I looked at them.

Oh my gosh.  To put it nicely, it looked like they had a fun day.  Becca had a gigantic splash of mud on the back of her shirt from throwing various objects into the sandbox-that-is-now-a-science-experiment-because-it’s-filled-with-water.  She had biker shorts on. Both of their hair?  Mess.  Chloe had on some hand me down flowered corduroys that were too short.  I made her change her pants, brushed some hair, and had them cover up with some hoodies.  Becca looked at me and said “Mom!  Why do we have to look nice?  We’re going to get ice cream, not to a wedding!”

Smart ass.  She’s never even been to a wedding.

We had a great night, got to the DQ before there was a long line, and headed to the park for a couple of hours.  Chloe passed out on the couch as soon as we got home.  Slept in her outfit all night.

Sure beats what was happening a month ago…more than two feet of snow and being stuck in the house for a week.  Glad that’s a distant memory!

Enjoy whatever weather YOU have!!!!