One Child? You Have No Idea!


I had a conversation with my nephew this weekend. Mind you, my nephew is 30 years old. He is married with a two year old son. He and his wife are wondering when to have that second one. Personally, I enjoyed having mine so close together. But hey, I’m just saying what worked for me.

Then we started talking about how different it is having TWO kids. I can only imagine how difficult it is to have MORE than two, but I’m gonna stick with what I know. I’m hoping that I didn’t scare them. I didn’t mean to be negative at all!!! I was simply stating how MY life changed. But anyway, I told them that the transition going from 1 child to 2 children was much more difficult than going from zero kids to 1 kid. And my friends tend to agree, so I felt comfortable saying this.

When you’re having your first child, the only time you’re sacrificing is your own. When child number two rolls around, the juggling begins. My girls are exactly 2 years apart. Two year olds don’t really understand the whole ‘taking care of the baby’ thing. Not for more than five minutes, anyway.

There’s the emotional part of trying to be even with each child. When they get older there’s the fighting.

Yup, lots of fighting.

My girls DO get along. But there’s always the fighting, too. I’m constantly breaking up arguments. Reasoning with one or the other. Or trying, anyway. I don’t think you’re really knee deep in parenting unless you’re breaking up fights.

Don’t get me wrong, there are other challenges with just one child. Challenges that I don’t really want, either. When you have only one child, YOU are the playmate. When I tell my kids to go play a game, they go play a game. I only need to give them some guidance. I don’t have to be an actual player. Sometimes I do play games with them, but at least there’s an option. Plus, I play by the rules, and that must not be cool with 3 and 5 year olds. They make up their own rules.

So, I say yes to nephew. Have that other child. I say have it soon. Because even though the work increases exponentially, so does the good stuff like kisses, hugs, and cuddles.

Categories : kids, life, motherhood, parenting


  1. Wendy Barnard says:

    Awesome, Heather! I also love having my kids close – they are all into the same things and understand each other’s silliness and don’t get “too annoyed” with each other. Having three kids is great too, but lots and lots of work – not too much at first, it was easy carting a baby around when you are used to being on the move, but trying to follow three kids in various places of the house has led to toilet paper art in the bathroom, water play in the toilet, marker art on walls and bodies, bedrooms being re-arranged with whatever if moveable (yes, toddler beds apparently are very light), clothes being taken out of drawers and put on and off for a fashion show, etc., etc., etc…. good times :). You are right, you can’t replace the love even with the extra work!!!!

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